Poser + I Know This Much Is True + New Song
Background music : Untitled
It's not completely done yet.
Tell me what you guys think and feel.
Hiya people! What's up?
Well, I slept at about 6am TODAY and woke up like 1.30pm TODAY.
I haven't been able to sleep at night, no idea what's wrong with me, man. I got my webcam fixed by knocking it a few more times. Funny how things work sometimes, huh? Was having fun with myself, posing and taking pictures.
To be frank, I love to take pictures! It's fun, you know?
Looking at how you'll look with different positions and poses. HaHa!
I've got some new fonts in my computer, photoshopped this picture.
My photoshop skills has improved!
"As you read this, those you love are betraying you."
Some fortune cookies.
Call me a poser, I don't care!
I've been reading Wally Lamb's second novel, I Know This Much Is True. It's about this two twin brothers, Dominick and Thomas who's a paranoid schizophrenic.
This is a VERY good book, people.
It got me reading and reading. Probably that's the reason why I've been sleeping late at night.
Go pick it up, I'm sure you'll like this nearly 900 pages masterpiece.
"It's not just a book, it's a life experience," trumpeted Oprah about her current selection, I Know This Much Is True.
Read more about the book.
So Long...
So Long Another song
Pick up the letters
Read your bitter
Sweet and anger
Darker and colder
A tear dropped from my face
So warm with such pace
Everything replayed
Such a wonderful place
Chorus :
And it's been oh so long
What's that day
Last year mid April
I guess you went away
Put back the letters
Went to bed with Bitter
Troubled mid December
A dream of cries of anger
I woke up to the sound
Of our merry go round
This science never lost count
Let your beautiful down
*Chorus*
And I've learnt to tell blue skies from pain
And find me a place where I could shelter my rain
My brain
A tear dropped from my face
So warm with such pace
Everything replayed
Such a wonderful place
I woke up to the sound
Of our merry go round
This science never lost count
Let your beautiful down
Tell me what you guys think!
Don't ask me why I changed the font, I just feel like it.
*Grin*
If you guys can't hear the background music for this song...
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Tick, Tock...
I've been checking the date everything midnight, just watching the days go by, it's scary, sometimes. 16th, 17th, and today it's 18th of December. I've wasted my holiday life, I guess.
This morning, I was holding a cup of coffee while thinking about how my future will be like. I imagined myself to be successful, rich, famous, loved, and not to forget, happy. I was day dreaming for about 2 minutes or so... shook my head, back to reality! I looked at myself, a mess. My room, a mess. My life, a mess. To be frank, I've been having this I-don't-want-to-care feeling going on. Well, you see, the problem is, I can't go on like this. It's gonna pull me down like it's done for other people. And, I wanna be on top, I wanna be the best, I don't want people to look down on me, underestimate me. I want them to admire me, I want to impress them with what I've succeed in this life on Earth. I won't deny that I LOVE winning, I LOVE the feeling of winning, it's one of the best feelings that human beings experience, don't you think?
Looking back, I've been good. I've been able to cope with things like, projects, studies, music, sports, chinese calligraphy and so on. I remembered one of my good friends told me that I am talented in many ways, I can do many things that people can't do, but I'm lacking of something that's the most important, ATTIDUDE. Well, it didn't offend me or anything, I salute that friend of mine, I totally agree with her. I was very glad that someone told me that, honestly. It's true, you know? About me lacking of this attidude thingy. If you wanna know who I really am, I tell you now. I'm Lazy, Irresponsible, Ignorant. Yeap, I admit them all. I haven't deny them before anyway.
I've been trying hard to change that, really. Since... God knows when. Earlier this year... I guess. I have to say that I preferred my previous life. I used to be so carefree, happy go lucky! The new life has gotten me stressed out, tired. I have to admit I've lost some great friends along the way, but I've met with new ones. It made me see whom are true and loyal. I realized I only have a few sincere friends around me. Those who doesn't use me, doesn't take me for granted, who are always there, always watching out for me, always honest to me. Yes, I only have a few of them, that makes me treasure them more. I know I've made lots of mistakes in these relationships. I do regret them, I do realize that I've done things the wrong way. And I'm still trying to change. Anyway, I've improved, a little, attitude wise. I've gotten my head out, the rest of my body is still in my 'kidding' self. But it doesn't matter, time will tell.
I'll be 17 in another 4 months. It scares the hell out of me! It's gonna be a dead serious year. I'm so afraid I'll not have enough time to complete what I want to do in this time of life. But I guess, there's always too much for us to do, too little time. I went out for a movie this afternoon with an old friend of mine. The last time we met was about 2 years ago. I met her from tuition. We were never in the same school before. We lost "touch" when we were 13. The magical thing about telephones. We talked once in a while over the phone. So, we are still in contact. Now, back to the outing. Well, she asked me this: What do you wanna do after you've graduated? I could feel the fear deep in me. I felt so unprepared. I told her I have no idea. I said if I'm really incapable of anything, I'll just go "Cha Kueh Tiaw" (Hawker, fried kueh tiaw). She laughed at that. I only smiled.
She suggested music school. Well, I love music. But my mom said I'll face problems if I were to study music. There's only two things I can do if i do so. One, become a music teacher (NO WAY, I'LL KILL THE KIDS)... Two, orchestra (I'm not brilliant and I'm no genius). My friend said I could compose music, write songs. I told her it's not going to work because nobody would want to listen to my music. Whatever it is, I'll just take music as a hobby.
I wanna do chemistry. I wanna study isotopes. I wanna make bombs. I wanna blow your mind! LOL. Sounds interesting huh? Yea... I know what you're thinking, I'm gonna blow my own freaking mind right? Or, I've lost my freaking mind. Who knows? But, remember this, I'll not make bombs, okay? I want people to have better lives, not destroy lives. I'm no genius, I'm no terrorist as well.
Perhaps I'll study guns. And work as a crime scene investigator. Ahh... Here me go again.
Probably I'll invent something. Something magical like the telephone. What's his name? Alexander Graham Bell? Or Alexander The Great? It's Alexander something right? Or Albert? Albert Einstein? Hmm... Maybe Wolfgang Mozart. Now I'm really taking rubbish.
I guess I'll just take what comes. I believe if I work hard, I'll make people be proud of me. Whatever I'll be, I wanna be somebody. That's for sure. I wanna make my parents see, I wanna make them turn and look twice. Some of you might say that all parents are proud of theirs kids, but it's been a long, long time since the last time I've received a compliment from them. I can't even remember when... I know I'm not what they want me to be, not how they want me to look like, not how they want me to react to things. I might've let them down many times... Somehow, they are always right!
Pheew, what a long post! I guess my brain juice has gone dry from all that evaporation. I hope yours is still fresh and moist after all that reading. Take the chance, change for the better, make life meaningful. Have a good day... Take care!
Selfish...
Selfish High Pitched
[Background music]
Hold on
It won't be long
I looked into your eyes
Into my heart
And I
I feel so cold
Even if you're here
I can't stay for too long
But it's okay
I tell myself
It's my fault
Everything went wrong
It's alright
I remind myself
It's not you
Baby please stay strong
You can call me selfish
You can call me senseless
You can call me anything you wish
I think about the days
I think about the ways
I think about every word
Oh every word you said
I know
I've let you down
I'm sorry to have doubts
You don't understand
And I know
I've been a fool
Over the things I've done
You don't have to forgive me
But baby please
Hang on for now
I don't care
How hard this sounds
Just take my hand
For a while
I know you can
Please don't let me drown
And I can't resist
And I don't wanna miss
My darling to sleep
For you I reach
Now won't you please
Fulfill my wish
You are the only one
That I need
Some of you might have seen this before.
Did this song about 6 months ago.
Finally I got it done!
Well, this is not the original version.
I've high pitched it...
Gotta fly fellas!
Take care!
Kids?
↑That's my little cousin, Jay.
I like the left bottom picture most!
Kids, honestly, I can't stand those who are damn freaking naughty. You know, those who like to break glasses and bite people. Oh yeah, and those who scream and cry a lot, frustrate me! Well, I adore them, some of them. I love those who talk to you as though you understand their baby language. I really like them, but God knows why they seemed to be afraid of me. I guess they are just scared of people with spiky hair. Scared that it might poke them or something.
I wish I could go back to that stage, of being a kid. Kids don't think much, and that's why they don't have anything to worry about. Their innocence... It's brilliant isn't it? Just sit there and play. And mommy will feed and give you anything you want.
I miss the feeling of being pampared... Don't you?
Against Me...
Against Me New song Background music
I watched
As the world
Passed me by
With just
One glance
One second yea
Trying to forget the silent goodbyes
And I wonder why
*Being hurt by something precious like a diamond
Feels so good
So good and it should
#You did something to me
And I don't know what it is
You did something to me
That I don't understand
Don't understand
I don't
Nananananana
To know
That you don't
Feel the same
[Feel the same as I do, you broke my heart in two]
I've wasted myself away
I'm running in circles again
I'm chasing my tail again
And why
Oh why
*#
Lay your hand near my heart
Look at me, hear me
I smell your skin in the dark
Do you see, feel me
You've been distant
You've been drifting away
#
And I
I wanna call you mind
And please
Fill me up with your love
This song is mainly about having someone you love and who hurts you constantly.
It doesn't matter if it hurts like hell, as long as you're here to heal me.
But I feel like dying, knowing that you're furthur, furthur... away.
Everyday I Love You Less And Less...
Everyday I Love You Less And Less
By Kaiser Chiefs
Album : Employment
[Background music]
Everyday I love you less and less
It's good to see that you’ve become obsessed
I got to get this message to the press
That Everyday I love you less and less
And Everyday I love you less and less
I’ve got to get this feeling off my chest
The doctor says all I need is some rest
Since Everyday I love you less and less
Unless unless
I know I feel it in my bones,
I’m sick I’m tired
Of staying in control
Oh yes I feel a rat apon the wheel
I got to know just not so much is real
Oh yes, I’m stressed
I’m sorry I digress
Depress, Digress
SOS
Oooooh and my parents love me
Oooooh and my girlfriend loves me
Oooooh
Everyday I love you less and less
I can't believe that me and you did sex
It makes me sick to think of you undress
Since everyday I love you less and less
And Everyday I love you less and less
You’re turning into something I detest
And everybody says you look a mess
Since everyday I love you less and less
Oooooh and my parents love me
Oooooh and my girlfriend loves me
Oooooh they keep photos love me
Oooooh that's enough love for me
Oooooh
Oooooh and my parents love me
Oooooh and my girlfriend loves me
Oooooh they keep photos of me
Oooooh that's enough love for me
Oooooh
**I think this is a nice song, like it
I love the verse in red
Try "Oh My God" too, a very good song as well
Take care
Goodbye**